I awoke this morning after a restless night’s sleep feeling like it was Christmas morning! (Yes, you read that right….you were thinking I’d feel like “meh” weren’t you?) I don’t know exactly why but I have a few guesses. Perhaps it was the opportunity I was presented with at church last night, maybe it was excitement at getting to spend this morning with a friend, or perhaps it was God moving in answering a long time prayer. Not answering as in making my pleas come to fruition, but in that I understand the direction in which I need to go. (I think. ….I’m still learning)
It wasn’t an “a-ha!” realization, it’s still not even a complete understanding. It’s the culmination of study, advise and prayer that are being pieced together so that I may understand what it is that God is trying to tell me. There are numerous self-helpers out there. People with, what seems like, good advice and suggestions that sound pretty reasonable. Many of them are being offered with sincere intentions and stuff that has helped many with their issues. Advice and testimonies from people who appear to have come from the same place I’m in right now. (Oh, you have a whiny 4 year old too?! You feel like you work all day and get no where also?! You feel like your dreams are just that?! Me too! What did you do to change your situation?!) The only problem with all of that? The intention that God has set for their life is completely different from that of mine. Though some of their advice may fit the plan He has set for me, the rest is just wasted time and misdirection that slows down God’s work in my life. So I look to the Bible… THE source of what IS known, and I pray.
The one thing I did hear, loud and clear, was I need to hand it over to God. Understanding that I have reached a point of floundering and so, instead of making things worse by taking the controls, like usual, and trying to get the outcome I want or think He wants for me, I need to step aside. (I envisioned a parent holding out a hand to take back the keys to the car because I was out past curfew the other night or taking away the cell phone because my grades were suffering due to the distraction of friends and media.)
Trust that God has only good planned for those who have faith, and that He is strong enough. I am simply getting in His way. So, I will respect Him, I will love him and I will wait patiently. (Which translates to: I will do my best to wait patiently as I hand it over to Him and try not to take it back or interrupt Him while he’s speaking into being.)
Tags: becoming, faith, hopes, life, Love, Patience, peace, Struggles
“But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it.” (Romans 8:25)
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