I learned how powerful God is today. It started in the wee hours of the morning and on throughout the day. I was given every reason to be furious and to let the hatred of others cast me down. According to today’s society and self-seeking morals I would have had every right to speak out and say my peace. To scream and scold and puff myself up. To act as though I were the more responsible adult. I came very close to allowing the hurt and the feelings of abandonment take over….then a miraculous thing happened.
I was at peace.
I not longer felt abandoned and as if all of my worth had been stripped from me. I no longer cared how others treated me because of one simple thing…. I am a child of God and I am loved! I remembered and I reflected that I have God on my side. I have Jesus interceding on my behalf and he loves me unconditionally and will NEVER betray me or leave me feeling as though I am not worth his time or his love.
I knew that every time my thoughts started to drift back to the hurt, it was satan trying to pull me back under. I held on to the truths that God has given me. I followed, to the best of my ability, his instructions. Satan lost his battle with me today and I rejoiced in my hardship! I thanked God for the hard times because I truly enjoyed the time that we had spent together over the past few years. This past year in particular has been the most fulfilling because our relationship has grown and blossomed. He’s seen me at my worst and he’s seen me at my average and never has he once left my side. He continued to guide and teach and care for me.
I let go of so much today. I realized how stupid arguing and nagging and holding a grudge is. This morning i clothed myself in strength and dignity and I never took my eyes off of Him. This morning at church we sang some of our usual songs and I sang with all of my heart because I truly believed that God will see me through and I wanted him to hear me thank him for his goodness towards me. This morning I chose love, the greatest gift that was ever given to me. Today I felt true peace and I am so thankful for it!
I have faith that God will provide and that He will see me through anything that comes. I have faith that I have happy times ahead of me and that my children will know true happiness. I have faith that I will have loving relationships that will bring glory to God and will stop satan in his tracks because there is power in numbers. I will not allow myself to be beaten down by others because I am worth everything to the one who made me.
People, nagging does nothing. Complaining does nothing. Like I tell my kids all the time as they’re running through the house…”If you would stop running, your brother/sister won’t chase you! It’s impossible to chase someone that won’t move.” Those words hit me like a semi today. That’s exactly what I have been doing for most of my life. Chasing someone or something that wasn’t even moving. They weren’t willing to move with me, to dance with me, to travel with me, to seek a life with me. So why was I putting so much effort into it and wearing myself down? Because I was seeking self worth. I was seeking validation and security in earthly things that simply can not provide any of that. Not in a way that lasts. People fail. Things can be taken from you. However, to God, I am everything and I will have faith in him. I have faith that he will show his love for me because he knows that I will praise him, in the good times and in the bad!
Tags: Christ, God, Love, peace, Praise, Redemption
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